i look ahead
all i see is darkness
shadows of humanity
flicker around me
with no form
and no definition
i look behind me
light cascades into the space
the shadows gain definition
i see humanity
illuminated by the light
21 dawns
and with it adulthood
i mourn the freedon of the child
and fear the responsibilities of the adult
is this a time to say goodbye to the wilds of youth
a time to become respectable
I think not...
the first half way always going to be hard
more in front than behind
but now i'm half way there
lent seems so short
i can see the light at the end
i'm going to make it
i sigh,
relieved
the 12 minute commute provides the backdrop
a journey through the urban sprawl of south manchester
diverse communities
diverse people
side by side
deprivation next to wealth
we slice through the city
untouched by its fragility
a window into our home
visible seams
once divided my days
not those seams have disappeared
into a chasm of banality
the days roll into one
as the once visible seams
fade into the monotony of the ongoing experience
the boredom of the lenten journey
sweet sixteen
50 cc
marriage
cigarettes
sex
a marking post on the journey into adulthood
a liminal time
a time of transition
and of transformation
where occasional glimpses of the past child
illuminate the potential adult
a metamorphosis into adulthood
the momentum begins to carry me
one day rolls into another
as the middle draws near
the momentum of the routine
of the forced pause
of the moment to think
the momentum
has become a part
of my inmost being
the creative spark
that birthed the initial excitement
has gone
all that remains is discipline
the discipline of completion
creativity and discipline
paradoxical bed-fellows
but when held in balance
sustain one another
and give purpose
to the routine of life
is this new life premature?
a brief glimmer of the future
or a seasonal change here to stay?
I hope it's a glimmer.
the temporal life enlivens my being
yet the fear of what it could be
darkens my soul
Recent Comments